slowknitter

Every once in a while I completely succumb, with money no less, to some sort of dorktastic aspect of a hobby. It happened when I beaded (special boxes to store beads, special tools with pink handles), when I was into needlepoint (special needlepoint box with a padded cover that would make Laura Ashley faint dead away from jealousy), crochet (I crotch-ed a queen size bed cover. Nothing dorkier than that. Nevermind that I was thisclose to back surgery, and that lying propped up for 5 months with all the “fun” drugs I could ever want started it. I’m not making excuses.)

And then came knitting. I found my holy grail of hobbies. I dream about knitting. I never dreamt about making a swarovski crystal bracelet. Nor did I ever dream of giving them to a boyfriend, proud of my work that was made with so much love.

I started off slow. A skein of yarn (a skein people! Not a “skank”. Do you know what a skank is around here? Some sloppy drunk chick in a bar in a short skirt with a tramp stamp, no panties, and a herpes sore or seven around her mouth looking for “some fun!” You know she’s not wearing panties because A) she’s told everyone and 7) she’s sitting on the barstoll with her legs open and her skirt hiked up. That’s a skank. But I digress)

Where was I? Oh yeah, One skein of very expensive metallic eyelash yarn, a pair of needles and a pattern for a very complicated lace scarf. (I will never forgive the lady who sold that to me. Whore.) I never finished it.

I persevered though. I started going to a nicer store. They helped me buy yarn and patterns that were more my speed. I made some pretty things. I made beautiful knit hats with Brown Sheep Burley Spun and size 15 needles. I got better. My stitches were even, the small things I made looked nice.

I got addicted. I started buying more yarn, different pretty yarns. I needed more needles. I needed more tools.

I got a swift and a ball winder. I love that the ball winder makes a ball that is flat on each end so it won’t go anywhere when you’re using it.

I got more needles. And more needles. And more needles.

Then I discovered addi’s. And I bought a ton of those too. Then? Socks. Sock yarn and sock needles. And knitting software. And more needles. And more yarn.

And books. Stacks of books. (these are the books I don’t use. The “good” books are by my bed)

And somewhere in the middle of all that I also started a blog. Then earlier this year I started a knitting blog. More tools, more yarn, more blogs.

(favorite knitting bag EVER- below)

More places to store things, more places to put new purchases. More.

Today though, today I may have moved into a whole new category of dork knitter.

I bought this:

So I could do this:

And this:

And this:

Or this:

It needs work. I need to make a white backdrop. The grey is ugly and does nothing for the colors of any yarn. The other side of the back drop is deep royal blue. Which will work for nothing.

I may have out dorked myself a few minutes after this photo shoot:

I took a picture of the whole set-up camera included with my camera phone.

And? After all this talk and blogging and photo taking? I didn’t knit a stitch today.

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